Welcome to a collection of 200 corny jokes that are sure to bring a smile to your face and a chuckle to your day.
Whether you need a quick laugh or something to lighten the mood, these jokes are perfect for any occasion.
With a variety of themes from one-liners to puns perfect for kids, there’s something here for everyone. So sit back, relax, and get ready to laugh at some of the corniest jokes ever!
Table of Contents
Best Corny Jokes
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
- I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
- What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!
- How do you organize a space party? You planet!
- What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!
Corny One-Liners
- I would avoid the sushi if I were you. It’s a little fishy!
- What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!
- I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
- Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.
- I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.
Kid-Friendly Corny Jokes
- What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite!
- Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert? Because she was stuffed.
- What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping? A dino-snore!
- How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut!
- Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
Punny Food Jokes
- Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two-tired!
- What do you call a factory that makes okay products? A satisfactory.
- What did one hat say to the other? Stay here, I’m going on a head.
- Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
- What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
Jokes for Music Lovers
- Why did the girl bring a ladder to the bar? Because she heard the drinks were on the house.
- What do you call a cow with a twitch? Beef jerky.
- Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
- What has ears but cannot hear? A cornfield.
- Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs.
Office Humor
- How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
- Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
- What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? An irrelephant.
- Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
- What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time.
Science Puns
- Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? He will stop at nothing to avoid them.
- Why can’t you trust stairs? They’re always up to something.
- What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody knows.
- Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut? He just needed a little space.
- Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.
Animal Jokes
- What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie? A python!
- What is a shark’s favorite game? Swallow the leader.
- Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they are shellfish.
- What do you call a fish without eyes? Fsh!
- What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador.
Technology Jokes
- How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None, that’s a hardware problem.
- What’s the biggest lie in the entire universe? “I have read and agree to the Terms & Conditions.”
- Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open.
- Why don’t programmers like nature? It has too many bugs.
- How do you find a spider on the internet? Just check his webpage.
Sports Puns
- Why do basketball players love donuts? Because they can dunk them!
- What’s a golfer’s favorite letter? Tee!
- Why don’t soccer players get cold? Because there’s a lot of fans!
- What do you call a swimming ghost? A bath specter!
- What race is never run? A stationary bike race.
Daily Dose of Dad Jokes
- Why did the coach go to the bank? To get his quarter back!
- What do you call a fish wearing a tie? Sofishticated.
- Why don’t crabs give to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
- How do you organize a fantastic space party? You planet.
- Why did the scarecrow become a successful motivational speaker? Because he was outstanding in his field!
Time Traveler’s Tickle
- I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
- What kind of music do mummies listen to? Wrap music.
- How do you make an apple turnover? Push it down a hill.
- What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!
- What happens when you go to the bathroom in France? European.
Classroom Chuckles
- Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems.
- What do you get when you mix a vampire and a teacher? Lots of blood tests!
- Why did the student eat his homework? Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake.
- What is a snake’s favorite subject? Hiss-tory!
- What do you do if someone rolls their eyes at you? Roll them back.
Silly Science Puns
- Did you hear about the first restaurant to open on the moon? It had great food, but no atmosphere.
- What do you call an acid with an attitude? A-mean-o acid.
- Why are chemists excellent for solving problems? They have all the solutions.
- How do astronomers organize a party? They planet.
- What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution.
Punny Animal Antics
- What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
- Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.
- What do you call a cow that can play a musical instrument? A moo-sician!
- How do you count cows? With a cowculator.
- What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.
Laffy Taffy Legends
- What does a cloud wear under his raincoat? Thunderwear!
- Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
- Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
- What do you call a pile of cats? A meow-tain.
- Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
Historical Hilarity
- Why did George Washington have trouble sleeping? Because he couldn’t lie.
- What tea did American colonists want? Libertea!
- Why did the British Empire struggle with tea? They couldn’t handle the Boston Tea Party.
- What’s Napoleon’s favorite type of music? European classical, because he had a complex about being a short composer.
- What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus!
Food Funnies
- Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged!
- Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out!
- How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it!
- What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!
- Why couldn’t the sesame seed leave the casino? He was on a roll.
Bar Banter
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms anymore? Because they make up everything!
- How do you drown a hipster? In the mainstream.
- Why did the bartender refuse to serve the ghost? Because he had no spirits.
- What did the grape say when it was stepped on? Nothing, but it let out a little wine.
- Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose!
Garden Giggles
- Why don’t plants use public transportation? They get too bushy during the rush hour!
- What do you call a well-dressed lion? A dandy lion!
- Why are trees very forgiving? Because in the Fall, they “Let It Go” and in the Spring, they “turn over a new leaf”.
- Why did the gardener plant a light bulb? He wanted to grow a power plant.
- How do trees access the internet? They log in.
Comical Crossings
- What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite!
- What do you call a kangaroo that’s a chef? A stir-fry hopper!
- What do you get when you cross a frog with a dog? A croaker spaniel.
- Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
- What do you get when you cross a vampire and a teacher? Lots of blood tests.
Techy Titters
- Why don’t programmers like to go outside? They prefer to bug indoors.
- How do you comfort a JavaScript bug? You console it.
- What do you call an iPhone that isn’t kidding around? Dead Siri-ous.
- Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open.
- What do computers eat for a snack? Microchips.
Quirky Quips
- Why do melons have weddings? Because they cantaloupe!
- What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backwards? A receding hare-line.
- What does a clock do when it’s hungry? It goes back four seconds.
- Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
- What do you call an everyday potato? A commentator.
Holiday Humor
- What do you get if you cross a Christmas tree with an iPad? A pine-apple!
- Why are Christmas trees so fond of the past? Because the present’s beneath them!
- What’s a ghost’s favorite Christmas story? The Fright before Christmas.
- Why don’t turkeys eat on Christmas? They are always stuffed!
- What do you call a broke Santa Claus? Saint Nickel-less.
Wordplay Wonders
- Why did the word break up with the punctuation mark? It didn’t want to be tied down.
- What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.
- What happens when you witness a shipwreck? You let it sink in.
- What’s a runner’s favorite subject in school? Jog-raphy!
- Why are elevator jokes so good? They work on many levels.
Sporting Silliness
- Why do golfers carry a spare pair of trousers? In case they get a hole in one.
- Why did the baseball team go to the bakery? They needed a good batter!
- What’s a tennis player’s favorite city? Volleywood.
- Why don’t hockey players drink tea? They prefer penalty boxes.
- What do you call a group of musical whales? An orca-stra.
Movie Mockeries
- Why don’t movies ever get cold? Because they always have a good cast.
- What do you call a movie about a bad golfer? Gone with the Wind.
- Why did the picture go to jail? Because it was framed.
- What kind of actor never gets cast? A shadow.
- What did the fish say when it starred in a movie? I’m hooked!
Nautical Nonsense
- Why don’t skeletons go on cruises? They don’t have the stomach for it.
- What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches? A nervous wreck.
- How do you make an octopus laugh? With ten-tickles.
- Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be bagels.
- What’s a pirate’s favorite exercise? The plank.
Lighthearted Legal
- What kind of lawyer represents ducks? A quack-titioner.
- What’s a judge’s favorite breakfast? Trial by cereal.
- Why don’t lawyers trust stairs? They are always up to something.
- What did the judge say to the skunk in court? Odor in the court!
- Why did the lawyer show up in court with a pencil? He wanted to draw a fine line between right and wrong.
Medieval Merriment
- Why did the king go to the dentist? To get his teeth crowned!
- What do you call a medieval pickpocket who only targets knights? A sir-charge.
- Why did the dragon refuse to fight the knight? It didn’t want to become grilled chicken.
- What do you call a knight who is afraid to fight? Sir Render.
- Why was the medieval army so good at puzzles? They had too many cross swords.
Galactic Giggles
- Why did the sun go to school? To get a little brighter!
- What do you call a tick on the moon? A luna-tick.
- How do you throw a space party? You planet.
- What’s an astronaut’s favorite part of a computer? The space bar.
- Why did the star go to school? To get a little more twinkle.
Wizardly Whims
- What do you call a magical dog? A labracadabrador.
- Why don’t wizards use computers? They’re afraid of spelling errors.
- What do you get when you cross a sorcerer with a millionaire? A witch rich.
- Why did the wizard stay in school? He couldn’t spell well.
- What do you call a wizard from outer space? A flying sorcerer.
Baffling Bookworms
- Why don’t books have friends? They have too many pages.
- What do you get when you cross a librarian and a lawyer? All the information you need, but you can’t understand any of it.
- What did one book say to the other? Can I take a look at your contents?
- Why was the library the tallest building? It had the most stories!
- What do you call a book that’s a great dancer? A novel ball.
Fitness Funnies
- Why did the gym close down? It just didn’t work out!
- Why don’t skeletons work out at the gym? They can’t increase their muscle mass.
- What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop!
- Why did the scarecrow become a yoga teacher? He was already outstanding in his field.
- What exercise do lazy people do? Diddly-squats.
Crafting Chuckles
- What did the carpenter say when he finished building his house? Nailed it!
- Why was the belt arrested? For holding up a pair of pants!
- What do you call an artistic fish? A drawfish.
- Why did the rope go to school? To learn to knot be tangled.
- How do you organize a small space? Use a compact disc.
Playground Puns
- Why do playgrounds always gossip? They’re full of swings and roundabouts.
- What do you call a slide that likes to take risks? A dare-devil!
- Why was the computer at the playground? It wanted to play on the slides.
- What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick.
- Why do swings love jokes? They’re always up for a good laugh.
Royal Riddles
- What game do princes play? Heirs and graces.
- Why did the prince study in the USA? To get a little more independents.
- What do you call a king who’s lost his car? A reign-check.
- Why don’t kings use doors? They prefer to make a grand entrance.
- What do royal fish wear to sleep? Their night gowns.
Paranormal Puns
- Why don’t ghosts like the rain? It dampens their spirits.
- What do you call a cleaning ghost? A dust spirit.
- Why did the ghost go into the bar? For the boos.
- What type of music do mummies like best? Wrap music.
- What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog? He is mist.
Botanical Banter
- Why don’t plants like math? It gives them square roots.
- What did the tree wear to the pool party? Swim trunks.
- What do you call a well-dressed lion? A dandy-lion.
- How do trees get online? They log in.
- Why did the flower take a break? It needed to re-pot itself.
The Final Funnies
- What do you call a group of unorganized cats? A cat-astrophe!
- Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.
- What do you call an alligator detective? An investi-gator.
- How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
- Why don’t skeletons fight each other? Because they don’t have the guts.
And there you have it, 200 corny jokes to brighten your day and bring a smile to anyone who hears them.
Whether you’re sharing them with friends, family, or keeping them for a rainy day, these jokes are sure to keep the laughter rolling. Remember, a day without laughter is a day wasted, so keep the jokes coming and the smiles wide!
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