30 Funny Possum Puns

Get ready to grin and bear these 30 hilarious puns all about possums. Whether you’re a wildlife enthusiast or just looking for a good laugh, these puns are sure to make you play possum with laughter.

Jump to:

Possum Puns

Prepare to hang in there for a laugh with this collection of puns centered around possums. Share these puns to spread the fun!

1. Why don’t possums ever get speeding tickets? Because they’re always playing dead on the road!
2. What do you call a possum with a shellfish allergy? An o-possum-phobic!
3. How do possums stay in touch with their friends? They use their cell-possums!
4. Why was the possum terrible at hide and seek? It kept playing dead every time someone got close!
5. What do you call a possum’s favorite dance move? The play dead-drop!
6. Why don’t possums make good secret agents? They always blow their cover by playing dead!
7. How do possums celebrate their birthdays? With a surprise possum party!
8. What’s a possum’s favorite type of music? Trash metal!
9. Why did the possum cross the road? To prove to the chicken it could be done!
10. What do you call a possum who’s always borrowing money? A loan shark… er, marsupial!

Possum One Liners

Enjoy these quick one-liners for some lighthearted amusement. Share these puns for a dose of possum fun.

• Possums never lose their cool; they’re always “hanging” in there.
• Why do possums make terrible poker players? They can’t “bluff” their way out of a paper bag.
• I tried to tell a possum joke, but it “played dead” with the audience.
• What did one possum say to the other during a game of tag? “You’re really ‘it’!”
• Possums are great at storytelling; they always have a “tail” to tell.
• Did you hear about the possum that joined a gymnastics team? It aced the “balance” beam.
• How do possums always stay positive? They “hang” on to hope.
• Why don’t possums ever enter cooking contests? They’re afraid of getting “baked”!
• What’s a possum’s favorite sport? “Play”-ground games!
• Did you hear about the possum that won a prize? It was quite “awesome”!

Best Possum Puns

These top-notch funny possum puns are sure to make you smile. These are the cream of the crop when it comes to possum-related humor!

21. Why don’t possums ever get invited to fancy dinner parties? They always bring their own doggy bag!
22. What’s a possum’s favorite reality TV show? Surviving the Roadkill!
23. How do possums break up with their partners? They ghost them… by playing dead!
24. Why did the possum fail its driving test? It kept freezing at every stop sign!
25. What do you call a possum with a PhD? Dr. Awesome Possum!
26. How do possums avoid paying taxes? They claim they’re “dead” broke!
27. Why don’t possums make good comedians? Their punchlines always fall flat… just like them on the road!
28. What’s a possum’s favorite board game? Risk… because they’re always risking it all on the highway!
29. How do possums stay fit? They do roadwork!
30. Why was the possum terrible at poker? It kept showing a dead man’s hand!

Final Thoughts

What’s a possum’s favorite cocktail? A Roadkill Runner with a splash of trash juice! How do possums celebrate New Year’s Eve? They play dead until the ball drops! Why don’t possums ever win at hide and seek? They always end up in plain sight on someone’s porch! What do you call a possum who’s obsessed with cleanliness? A neat freak of nature! How do possums prepare for job interviews? They practice playing dead to avoid tough questions!

We hope these possum puns brought a smile to your face and a chuckle to your heart. If you’re still ready for more humor, check out these other collections of dad jokes:

Remember, sharing a good laugh is a wonderful way to connect with others. Share these puns with friends and family for some playful enjoyment!