Who doesn’t need a good laugh now and then? Whether you’re looking to lighten the mood at work, keep the kids entertained, or just share a smile, these 101 clean jokes are perfect for any occasion. Ready to laugh out loud? Let’s dive in these Hilarious Clean Jokes!
Table of Contents
Classic Puns and Wordplay
1. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself?
- It was two-tired!
2. What do you call fake spaghetti?
- An impasta!
3. How do you organize a space party?
- You planet!
4. Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
- Because they make up everything!
5. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
- Frostbite!
6. What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
- It let out a little wine!
7. Why was the math book sad?
- It had too many problems!
8. Why do ducks have feathers?
- To cover their butt quacks!
9. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
- A carrot!
10. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? – Nacho cheese!
11. How does a penguin build its house? – Igloos it together!
12. Why did the scarecrow win an award? – Because he was outstanding in his field!
13. What do you call an alligator in a vest? – An investigator!
14. What has ears but cannot hear? – A cornfield!
15. What gets wetter the more it dries? – A towel!
16. What do you call a sleeping bull? – A bulldozer!
17. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? – They don’t have the guts.
18. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? – Because he was always spotted.
19. What do you call a pile of cats? – A meowtain!
20. How do you catch a squirrel? – Climb a tree and act like a nut!
21. Why do bananas use sunscreen? – Because they peel!
22. What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping? – A dino-snore!
23. What has keys but can’t open locks? – A piano!
24. Why couldn’t the pony sing a lullaby? – She was a little hoarse!
25. What do you call a cow with no legs? – Ground beef!
Animal Antics and Silly Scenarios Hilarious Clean Jokes
26. Why are ghosts bad liars? – Because you can see right through them!
27. What kind of tree fits in your hand? – A palm tree!
28. What do lawyers wear to court? – Lawsuits!
29. What’s a frog’s favorite type of shoes? – Open toad sandals!
30. What do you call a bear with no teeth? – A gummy bear!
31. What did the ocean say to the shore? – Nothing, it just waved.
32. Why do bees have sticky hair? – Because they use honeycombs!
33. What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? – A stick!
34. Why was the computer cold? – It left its Windows open!
35. What do you call two birds in love? – Tweethearts!
36. What’s a ghost’s favorite fruit? – Boo-berries!
37. What do you call a belt with a watch on it? – A waist of time!
38. Why do bicycles fall over? – Because they are two-tired!
39. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? – Supplies!
40. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? – They’d crack each other up!
41. What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? – A river!
42. What do you call a dog magician? – A labracadabrador!
43. What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument? – A trombone!
44. Why did the tomato turn red? – Because it saw the salad dressing!
45. Why did the bicycle fall over? – It was two-tired!
46. What did one wall say to the other? – I’ll meet you at the corner!
47. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? – An abdominal snowman!
48. What do you call a fish with two knees? – A two-knee fish!
49. What’s the best way to watch a fly fishing tournament? – Live stream!
50. What did the zero say to the eight? – Nice belt!
Workplace Wit and Everyday Humor
51. Why do crabs never give to charity?
- Because they’re shellfish!
52. What do you call a factory that makes okay products?
- A satisfactory!
53. What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter?
- An irrelephant!
54. What do you call a computer floating in the ocean?
- A Dell Rolling in the Deep!
55. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
- Supplies!
56. Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
- They don’t have the guts.
57. What did one plate say to the other plate?
- Dinner is on me!
58. Why did the student eat his homework?
- Because the teacher told him it was a piece of cake!
59. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back?
- A stick.
60. Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
- Because they make up everything!
61. Why did the picture go to jail?
- Because it was framed!
62. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
- Frostbite!
63. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
- In case he got a hole in one!
64. What do you call a man with a rubber toe?
- Roberto.
65. What do you call a funny mountain?
- Hill-arious!
66. What’s brown and sticky?
- A stick!
67. Why do bees hum?
- Because they don’t know the words!
68. What do you call a fake noodle?
- An impasta!
69. How do you make holy water?
- You boil the hell out of it!
70. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
- Nacho cheese!
71. What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?
- Sneakers!
72. How does a penguin build its house?
- Igloos it together!
73. What has keys but can’t open locks?
- A piano!
74. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself?
- It was two tired!
Miscellaneous Merriment
75. What do you call a belt made of watches?
- A waist of time!
76. Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon?
- He was outstanding in his field!
77. What happens to a frog’s car when it breaks down?
- It gets toad away!
78. Why don’t some couples go to the gym?
- Because some relationships don’t work out!
79. What does a cloud wear under his raincoat?
- Thunderwear!
80. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married.
- The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent!
81. Why do banana never feel lonely?
- Because they hang out in bunches!
82. What do you call a cow with no legs?
- Ground beef!
83. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
- An abdominal snowman!
84. What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
- A nervous wreck!
85. What did one wall say to the other wall?
- I’ll meet you at the corner!
86. Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
- Because they make up everything!
87. How do you throw a space party?
- You planet!
88. Why did the tomato turn red?
- Because it saw the salad dressing!
89. What kind of music do mummies listen to?
- Wrap music!
90. What do you call an alligator in a vest?
- An investigator!
91. What happens when you go to the bathroom in France?
- European!
92. What do you call a bear with no teeth?
- A gummy bear!
93. Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
- They don’t have the guts.
94. What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college?
- Bison!
95. What do you call a pile of kittens?
- A meowtain!
96. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek?
- Because he was always spotted.
97. What do you get from a pampered cow?
- Spoiled milk!
98. Why did the scarecrow win an award?
- Because he was outstanding in his field!
99. What do you call a man who can do a job in 12 months?
- A calendar!
100. Why did the computer go to the doctor?
- It had a virus!
101. What did one elevator say to the other?
- I think I’m coming down with something!
Loved the jokes on workplace wit. Reminds me of the fun we have at work haha. Keep it coming, Adrianna Rick!
haha the animal jokes are the best part. never heard some of them before.
Right? I’m sharing these with my roomies!
Glad to see good humor is still alive. Makes for a brighter day.
These jokes are a hit at the dinner table. Thanks for the laughs!
You are not right. I suggest it to discuss. Write to me in PM.
Magnificent website. A lot of helpful information here. I am sending it to several buddies ans also sharing in delicious. And obviously, thanks to your sweat!
Модные заметки по подбору необычных луков на любой день.
Обзоры стилистов, события, все новинки и мероприятия.
Стильные заметки по выбору отличных луков на каждый день.
Заметки экспертов, события, все новые коллекции и шоу.
In it something is also idea good, agree with you.
Everyone loves what you guys are up too. This kind of clever work and coverage! Keep up the great works guys I’ve incorporated you guys to my blogroll.
This is really interesting, You are a very skilled blogger. I have joined your feed and look forward to seeking more of your fantastic post. Also, I’ve shared your site in my social networks!
I savor, result in I found just what I used to be taking a look for. You have ended my 4 day long hunt! God Bless you man. Have a great day. Bye
Good ?V I should definitely pronounce, impressed with your website. I had no trouble navigating through all the tabs and related info ended up being truly easy to do to access. I recently found what I hoped for before you know it in the least. Quite unusual. Is likely to appreciate it for those who add forums or anything, website theme . a tones way for your client to communicate. Nice task..
Hello There. I found your blog using msn. This is a very well written article. I’ll be sure to bookmark it and return to read more of your useful information. Thanks for the post. I will certainly comeback.
I like what you guys are up also. Such smart work and reporting! Keep up the superb works guys I have incorporated you guys to my blogroll. I think it’ll improve the value of my website 🙂
I have recently started a site, the info you provide on this site has helped me greatly. Thank you for all of your time & work.
I have read some good stuff here. Certainly value bookmarking for revisiting. I wonder how much attempt you place to create this type of excellent informative website.
Just a smiling visitor here to share the love (:, btw outstanding design and style.
Бренд Vetements можно купить в этом магазине. Оригинальная продукция Vetements доступна для покупки с быстрой доставкой.
This is a very good tips especially to those new to blogosphere, brief and accurate information… Thanks for sharing this one. A must read article.
I would like to thnkx for the efforts you’ve put in writing this web site. I am hoping the same high-grade blog post from you in the upcoming as well. Actually your creative writing abilities has inspired me to get my own blog now. Really the blogging is spreading its wings quickly. Your write up is a great example of it.
I believe this website has very great indited written content articles.
Hi my friend! I want to say that this post is awesome, nice written and come with approximately all significant infos. I’d like to peer extra posts like this.
My coder is trying to convince me to move to .net from PHP. I have always disliked the idea because of the costs. But he’s tryiong none the less. I’ve been using Movable-type on a number of websites for about a year and am nervous about switching to another platform. I have heard great things about blogengine.net. Is there a way I can transfer all my wordpress content into it? Any help would be really appreciated!
Heya are using WordPress for your site platform? I’m new to the blog world but I’m trying to get started and create my own. Do you require any html coding knowledge to make your own blog? Any help would be greatly appreciated!
Please let me know if you’re looking for a writer for your weblog. You have some really good articles and I feel I would be a good asset. If you ever want to take some of the load off, I’d absolutely love to write some material for your blog in exchange for a link back to mine. Please blast me an e-mail if interested. Kudos!
Wow, incredible blog format! How long have you been running a blog for? you made running a blog glance easy. The full look of your site is magnificent, let alone the content!
Thankyou for this post, I am a big big fan of this web site would like to proceed updated.
I love it when people come together and share opinions, great blog, keep it up.
You really make it seem really easy with your presentation however I to find this topic to be actually one thing which I believe I might by no means understand. It seems too complicated and very large for me. I am having a look forward in your subsequent publish, I’ll try to get the hold of it!
Great remarkable issues here. I am very happy to look your post. Thank you so much and i’m looking forward to contact you. Will you please drop me a e-mail?
I like this website very much, Its a real nice post to read and find information.
Thanks for any other excellent post. Where else may just anyone get that type of information in such an ideal way of writing? I have a presentation subsequent week, and I am on the look for such info.
Thanks for sharing superb informations. Your web-site is very cool. I’m impressed by the details that you¦ve on this web site. It reveals how nicely you understand this subject. Bookmarked this website page, will come back for more articles. You, my pal, ROCK! I found just the information I already searched everywhere and simply couldn’t come across. What an ideal website.
Undeniably believe that which you stated. Your favorite reason seemed to be on the web the easiest thing to be aware of. I say to you, I certainly get annoyed while people consider worries that they plainly do not know about. You managed to hit the nail upon the top and defined out the whole thing without having side effect , people could take a signal. Will likely be back to get more. Thanks
Youre so cool! I dont suppose Ive learn anything like this before. So good to search out anyone with some original thoughts on this subject. realy thanks for starting this up. this web site is something that’s needed on the net, somebody with somewhat originality. useful job for bringing something new to the internet!
Great article and right to the point. I don’t know if this is truly the best place to ask but do you guys have any ideea where to get some professional writers? Thank you 🙂
Amazing blog! Is your theme custom made or did you download it from somewhere? A theme like yours with a few simple adjustements would really make my blog shine. Please let me know where you got your theme. Many thanks
I am not real great with English but I line up this real leisurely to read .
The very heart of your writing whilst sounding agreeable in the beginning, did not really sit perfectly with me personally after some time. Somewhere within the paragraphs you actually managed to make me a believer but only for a while. I however have got a problem with your leaps in assumptions and you would do nicely to fill in all those breaks. In the event that you can accomplish that, I will undoubtedly end up being impressed.
Great ?V I should certainly pronounce, impressed with your website. I had no trouble navigating through all the tabs and related information ended up being truly simple to do to access. I recently found what I hoped for before you know it at all. Quite unusual. Is likely to appreciate it for those who add forums or anything, website theme . a tones way for your client to communicate. Excellent task..
I was looking through some of your articles on this site and I conceive this website is rattling instructive! Retain putting up.
I believe this website holds some very good info for everyone : D.
Hello my loved one! I wish to say that this article is amazing, nice written and include almost all vital infos. I would like to see more posts like this.
I really like your writing style, wonderful information, thanks for posting : D.
I am lucky that I found this site, precisely the right info that I was searching for! .
I like your writing style really loving this site.
When I originally commented I clicked the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and now each time a comment is added I get four emails with the same comment. Is there any way you can remove me from that service? Thanks!